Whirlwind. It's a word that aptly describes a typical 15-month-old, and life with a toddler this age is never dull. His attention is equally divided between his toys and you. Children thrive on their parents' attention, and if you happen to leave the area where he's playing, he'll come looking for you within a few minutes because he wants to know that you're paying attention to him. "See! See!" is probably a common refrain in your house as your child tries to balance his drive to be more independent with his need to know he can depend on you.
Until now, your toddler has been preoccupied with checking out his surroundings and the objects in his world. Now he's just as curious about the effects of his behavior on other people, and his connection with you is vital to his confidence. During this period of social exploration you may see him trying to get your attention anyway he can. He'll shout, imitate gestures he sees you and other adults making, pinch, poke, shove, whine, and cry, all in an attempt to see how you react, and what it takes for him to get what he wants. He will quickly realize that various behaviors get different results from the adults who surround him. He may learn that he gets what he wants faster if he laughs instead of whines. Or that whining will get him what he wants from his grandfather, but not from his mom or dad. This experimentation is all part of socialization, and if you are consistent with enforcing limits, he'll soon learn which behaviors are acceptable and which aren't.
The wilder things your child does to maintain his connection with you and your attention on him may be more annoying and frustrating for you than for your toddler. Really listening when your toddler is trying to tell you something and giving him as much attention as you can may head off a great deal of whining and screaming, but when you've reached your limit you may simply need to remove yourself from the room. Put your toddler in his crib or playpen and step out for a few minutes, take a few deep breaths, and take a moment to remind yourself that he's going through a phase.
Consider getting involved in a playgroup that includes some children who are slightly older than yours. Preschool-age children are capable of engaging their younger friends in pretend play, and yours may enjoy being with kids who are willing to take a "leadership" role in play. Playing with a mixed-age group can also be a great way for the younger ones to learn about cooperation.
If your child is reluctant to let you out of his sight, a small group of two or three children who are your child's same age will probably suit your toddler best, and once he's gotten used to "playing" with one or two other children his own age, it will be easier for him to be away from you.
Everyone loves a clown, and your 15-month-old already realizes this. Once he recognizes that a certain behavior — dancing, crawling like a baby, doing somersaults — gets a positive response from you, he'll do it over and over not just because he can, but because he loves to be the center of attention. After a silly dance performance, for instance, he'll look around the room just to see what kind of effect his moves have had on the audience, and if he has everyone's attention, he'll offer an encore.
Don't be surprised if your toddler already seems to treat you and your spouse differently. Whichever parent he spends the most time with will be the one he demands more of and is hardest on. If Mom's around more, Dad will be treated like someone special, and vice versa. While this may make one of you feel jealous, know that it's normal and is your child's way of testing out his relationship with each of you. Family dynamics, and your child's shifting loyalties, will be more and more evident during the next few months as he becomes increasingly independent.
Finally, as toddlers begin to experiment with imaginative play, they also sometimes start to have nightmares. A 15-month-old is reaching an age where he can start to think on a symbolic level and is able to transform reality into fantasy (not that he could explain this to you!). It will be several years before your child can distinguish between dreams and reality. Since he probably can't use words to tell you about his dreams, you'll have to rely on unusual behaviors to alert you. Children who are stressed or anxious (usually related to tension in the family or problems with daycare or preschool) are prone to nightmares. If your usually sound sleeper awakens crying in the night and can't tell you why he's upset, try talking to him in a soothing voice and rubbing his back until he settles down.
At this age, all you can do is comfort your child and perhaps establish some sort of routine to banish the "monsters" from his room. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests reading your toddler some stories about dreams and sleep, such as In the Night Kitchen, by Maurice Sendak, to help him understand that they're nothing to be afraid of.
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