Saturday, October 22, 2011
Emmy Newborn Session - Part II
Since I have a crazy toddler running around durning these newborn sessions with Emmy, I don't get too much time to get good pics, so I have to take advantage of whenever I get a chance!
Friday, October 21, 2011
First Time Out with 2 Kids
First time out as a family. The four of us at Target, and then we went to Panera for lunch. :)
Two kids in two car seats take up the whole backseat!
Wow - we really have 2 kids now!
Mila eating grilled cheese sandwich with yogurt.
Emmy sleeping... as usual!
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Breastfeeding Problems... Resolved
So despite my best efforts, Emmy and I have been having problems with breastfeeding. :(
Remembering all the problems Mila and I had, I knew I wanted to do my best to make sure we didn't have the same problems when Emmy was born. So I made sure to have multiple nurses take a look at her latch to make sure everything was alright. Everyone said she was doing great and that her latch looked good! But I was having pain and I couldn't understand why. She was making clicking noises too, and she shouldn't be making any noises, if the latch is right. But all the nurses said everything looked good. So I just figured it was that I was getting used to it again - it had already been about 9 months since Mila stopped nursing.
I was trying to suck it up and deal with the pain, but every nursing hurt so much! Within a day or two of being home, I started pumping and we were feeding her with a syringe (there is a concern that using a bottle with a baby this young could cause nipple confusion and would cause more problems with her taking the breast - the last thing I need is to add to the problems we were already having!) Once my milk had come in (those first few days you only produce colostrum, not milk) I figured I could use a nipple shield to help with the pain (I did this with Mila as well) and that I could put her back on the breast. But strangely enough, she wouldn't take the nipple shield! I didn't know what to do - since I'd been pumping, I was starting to feel better enough to try nursing again but it would only leave me sore again!
To add to the pressure, at Emmy's first pediatrician appointment on Saturday, he said she hadn't gained her birthweight back and was concerned I "wasn't producing enough milk" and he thought perhaps my milk hadn't come in yet. I didn't really believe this, because I knew my milk had come in, but regardless, he wanted me to put Emmy on a feeding schedule (I've been feeding her on-demand) and he
wanted to see her again in a few days. I was starting to stress about it.
That night, I stumbled across this blog post that my Bradley teacher posted on her Facebook page. It was a story of one woman's determination to breastfeed despite difficulty due to something called "tongue tie." I'd heard of it before - it's when the tissue under the tongue, called a frenulum, is tight and doesn't let the baby latch on right. It can cause pain while breastfeeding. I had started reading the story because it was breastfeeding related, but the more I read, I started noticing similarities between Emmy and the baby in the story. By the time I was done reading, I was convinced Emmy was tongue tied and started to do research on it.
I found lots of articles and she had several of the symptoms, the most obvious was pain during breastfeeding, a clicking noise when nursing, she cried with her tongue down (it should curl upward) and when she was on the breast, she'd leave my nipple shaped like the tip of a lipstick. This first article was the most helpful, as it showed pictures of what a baby with a tongue tie looks like and what symptoms to look out for.
Is My Baby Tongue-Tied?
http://cwgenna.com/quickhelp.html
Diagnosis of a Tongue Tie
http://kiddsteeth.com/Does_Your_Child_Need_a_Revision_of_the_Lingual_Frenum2010.pdf
Tongue Tie Assesment
http://kiddsteeth.com/articles/tonguetie%20assesment.htm
After reading all of this, I was even more convinced Emmy had it. I printed out these articles and showed them to Jorge. He wasn't completely convinced she had it. To me - there was no doubt in my mind!!!
The first obstacle is getting her diagnosed. Apparently, it isn't easy to find someone that is trained to recognize the different types of tongue ties. Usually a pediatric dentist or pediatric surgeon would be able to accurately diagnose it. Not all tongue ties are the same and not all pediatricians can recognize the lesser common posterior ties. The next obstacle is then finding someone that can clip the frenulum to relax the tissue. That's the only cure. I emailed my Bradley teacher, Tracy, to see if there was anything she could recommend and I was so happy I asked! She was amazingly helpful and it turned out that her son had a tongue tie when he was born (he is now 5 months) and she had to get his clipped. She explained that it's a quick outpatient procedure done right there in the doctor's office with no anesthesia and once they clip it, you could nurse right away and you may even notice immediate difference in the latch. She gave me her lactation consultant's phone number to help me get more information on it.
I called her lactation consultant, Pam, who was also very helpful and generous with her time explaining everything to me. She sent me to the some of the same sites I'd just been researching to compare pictures to Emmy. She said based on my descriptions of everything, (pain when nursing, baby crying with the tongue down, clicking noises when she nursed and the strange shape she left my nipple in) she thought it was very, very possible Emmy had a tongue tie. She gave me the information of a pediatric surgeon at Joe Dimaggio Children's Hospital in Hollywood (the one that Tracy used for her son) that I could call and make and appointment with. She said Dr. Long could diagnose as well as cut the frenulum if she needed it. What a relief!! I called first thing on Monday morning and they were able to squeeze me in for Wednesday - which I was so thankful for, but it was two whole days away - that's over 20 feedings!
In the meantime, I had the follow up appointment with the pediatrician. Leading up to the appointment, I had made sure to feed her plenty and I was confident she was eating well. The nurse weighed her, and to my relief, Emmy had gained her birth weight back, but he said expected her to have gained more. He recommended that I should supplement Emmy with formula and he wanted to see her back in a week. Despite what he said - I honestly believed that she was doing well. She'd been peeing and pooing great, her lips were always moist (they dry out easily if they're hungry) and most importantly, she'd been in a great mood!
I told him I thought she had tongue tie. I explained her symptoms and my reasons why, but he was skeptical and he quickly checked her mouth and said no. He barely looked! Sigh. I felt like he wasn't taking my concerns seriously. So frustrating. I may not be a doctor, but I KNOW my kid. I didn't even bother to tell him about Emmy's appointment at the Joe Dimaggio Children's Hospital with the pediatric surgeon in a couple of days.
Yesterday was finally the day of the appointment. The place was PACKED! Apparently, this doctor sees all kinds of cases. Since they'd squeezed us in, we had to wait - and wait we did! We waited about 3 hours!! Thank goodness Cindy came with us - we definitely needed someone to keep Mila entertained at the doctor's office.
Once Dr. Long saw us, it was quick. I explained my concerns and what symptoms she had. She looked in her mouth and, sure enough - said Emmy had a posterior tie (one of the harder ties to diagnose). She said it wasn't too bad, and should not affect her speech but if we were having problems breastfeeding, cutting it could help. We agreed to cutting it - I was both relieved and terrified! I was thrilled we had discovered the problem, but in just moments she would be cutting her mouth and I knew it would be painful. :(
Thankfully, just like Tracy said, the cut was quick - Emmy cried more that Dr. Long was forcing her mouth open! She cut it and immediately soldered it silver nitrate so it wouldn't bleed. She did it right there and it took like 2 minutes. I nursed her right away, but didn't feel an immediate difference until later that night. She was even nursing with a nipple shield!
I am so happy I followed my instincts and researched the tongue tie! I'm so thankful for friends like Tracy and people like Pam, the lactation consultant! I don't know what I would have done - I'm sure if this hadn't been resolved, I wouldn't have been able to continue breastfeeding, and that would have been heartbreaking for all of us. Since she got her tie cut yesterday, I've definitely noticed a difference with the mobility of her tongue and now that she's able to latch on to the nipple shield, we're almost exclusively back on the breast. Soon - no more pumping!! Hooray!!
Remembering all the problems Mila and I had, I knew I wanted to do my best to make sure we didn't have the same problems when Emmy was born. So I made sure to have multiple nurses take a look at her latch to make sure everything was alright. Everyone said she was doing great and that her latch looked good! But I was having pain and I couldn't understand why. She was making clicking noises too, and she shouldn't be making any noises, if the latch is right. But all the nurses said everything looked good. So I just figured it was that I was getting used to it again - it had already been about 9 months since Mila stopped nursing.
I was trying to suck it up and deal with the pain, but every nursing hurt so much! Within a day or two of being home, I started pumping and we were feeding her with a syringe (there is a concern that using a bottle with a baby this young could cause nipple confusion and would cause more problems with her taking the breast - the last thing I need is to add to the problems we were already having!) Once my milk had come in (those first few days you only produce colostrum, not milk) I figured I could use a nipple shield to help with the pain (I did this with Mila as well) and that I could put her back on the breast. But strangely enough, she wouldn't take the nipple shield! I didn't know what to do - since I'd been pumping, I was starting to feel better enough to try nursing again but it would only leave me sore again!
To add to the pressure, at Emmy's first pediatrician appointment on Saturday, he said she hadn't gained her birthweight back and was concerned I "wasn't producing enough milk" and he thought perhaps my milk hadn't come in yet. I didn't really believe this, because I knew my milk had come in, but regardless, he wanted me to put Emmy on a feeding schedule (I've been feeding her on-demand) and he
wanted to see her again in a few days. I was starting to stress about it.
That night, I stumbled across this blog post that my Bradley teacher posted on her Facebook page. It was a story of one woman's determination to breastfeed despite difficulty due to something called "tongue tie." I'd heard of it before - it's when the tissue under the tongue, called a frenulum, is tight and doesn't let the baby latch on right. It can cause pain while breastfeeding. I had started reading the story because it was breastfeeding related, but the more I read, I started noticing similarities between Emmy and the baby in the story. By the time I was done reading, I was convinced Emmy was tongue tied and started to do research on it.
I found lots of articles and she had several of the symptoms, the most obvious was pain during breastfeeding, a clicking noise when nursing, she cried with her tongue down (it should curl upward) and when she was on the breast, she'd leave my nipple shaped like the tip of a lipstick. This first article was the most helpful, as it showed pictures of what a baby with a tongue tie looks like and what symptoms to look out for.
Is My Baby Tongue-Tied?
http://cwgenna.com/quickhelp.html
Diagnosis of a Tongue Tie
http://kiddsteeth.com/Does_Your_Child_Need_a_Revision_of_the_Lingual_Frenum2010.pdf
Tongue Tie Assesment
http://kiddsteeth.com/articles/tonguetie%20assesment.htm
After reading all of this, I was even more convinced Emmy had it. I printed out these articles and showed them to Jorge. He wasn't completely convinced she had it. To me - there was no doubt in my mind!!!
The first obstacle is getting her diagnosed. Apparently, it isn't easy to find someone that is trained to recognize the different types of tongue ties. Usually a pediatric dentist or pediatric surgeon would be able to accurately diagnose it. Not all tongue ties are the same and not all pediatricians can recognize the lesser common posterior ties. The next obstacle is then finding someone that can clip the frenulum to relax the tissue. That's the only cure. I emailed my Bradley teacher, Tracy, to see if there was anything she could recommend and I was so happy I asked! She was amazingly helpful and it turned out that her son had a tongue tie when he was born (he is now 5 months) and she had to get his clipped. She explained that it's a quick outpatient procedure done right there in the doctor's office with no anesthesia and once they clip it, you could nurse right away and you may even notice immediate difference in the latch. She gave me her lactation consultant's phone number to help me get more information on it.
I called her lactation consultant, Pam, who was also very helpful and generous with her time explaining everything to me. She sent me to the some of the same sites I'd just been researching to compare pictures to Emmy. She said based on my descriptions of everything, (pain when nursing, baby crying with the tongue down, clicking noises when she nursed and the strange shape she left my nipple in) she thought it was very, very possible Emmy had a tongue tie. She gave me the information of a pediatric surgeon at Joe Dimaggio Children's Hospital in Hollywood (the one that Tracy used for her son) that I could call and make and appointment with. She said Dr. Long could diagnose as well as cut the frenulum if she needed it. What a relief!! I called first thing on Monday morning and they were able to squeeze me in for Wednesday - which I was so thankful for, but it was two whole days away - that's over 20 feedings!
In the meantime, I had the follow up appointment with the pediatrician. Leading up to the appointment, I had made sure to feed her plenty and I was confident she was eating well. The nurse weighed her, and to my relief, Emmy had gained her birth weight back, but he said expected her to have gained more. He recommended that I should supplement Emmy with formula and he wanted to see her back in a week. Despite what he said - I honestly believed that she was doing well. She'd been peeing and pooing great, her lips were always moist (they dry out easily if they're hungry) and most importantly, she'd been in a great mood!
(Later on, I gave it some thought and I realized I didn't finish nursing her before she was weighed. Perhaps that's one of the reasons she hadn't "weighed enough"? Even an ounce makes a difference at this point!! Plus, they didn't weigh her on the same scale - were all these calibrated?)
I told him I thought she had tongue tie. I explained her symptoms and my reasons why, but he was skeptical and he quickly checked her mouth and said no. He barely looked! Sigh. I felt like he wasn't taking my concerns seriously. So frustrating. I may not be a doctor, but I KNOW my kid. I didn't even bother to tell him about Emmy's appointment at the Joe Dimaggio Children's Hospital with the pediatric surgeon in a couple of days.
Yesterday was finally the day of the appointment. The place was PACKED! Apparently, this doctor sees all kinds of cases. Since they'd squeezed us in, we had to wait - and wait we did! We waited about 3 hours!! Thank goodness Cindy came with us - we definitely needed someone to keep Mila entertained at the doctor's office.
Once Dr. Long saw us, it was quick. I explained my concerns and what symptoms she had. She looked in her mouth and, sure enough - said Emmy had a posterior tie (one of the harder ties to diagnose). She said it wasn't too bad, and should not affect her speech but if we were having problems breastfeeding, cutting it could help. We agreed to cutting it - I was both relieved and terrified! I was thrilled we had discovered the problem, but in just moments she would be cutting her mouth and I knew it would be painful. :(
Thankfully, just like Tracy said, the cut was quick - Emmy cried more that Dr. Long was forcing her mouth open! She cut it and immediately soldered it silver nitrate so it wouldn't bleed. She did it right there and it took like 2 minutes. I nursed her right away, but didn't feel an immediate difference until later that night. She was even nursing with a nipple shield!
I am so happy I followed my instincts and researched the tongue tie! I'm so thankful for friends like Tracy and people like Pam, the lactation consultant! I don't know what I would have done - I'm sure if this hadn't been resolved, I wouldn't have been able to continue breastfeeding, and that would have been heartbreaking for all of us. Since she got her tie cut yesterday, I've definitely noticed a difference with the mobility of her tongue and now that she's able to latch on to the nipple shield, we're almost exclusively back on the breast. Soon - no more pumping!! Hooray!!
Don't mess with the boob!
Toddler This Week: 21 Months, Week 3
Try something new: Ditch the stroller and let your toddler lead you on a walk around the block. You'll be amazed at how many times your curious explorer stops to check out small objects, such as an interesting rock, a dead leaf, or a parade of ants. Your toddler isn't trying to drive you crazy by dawdling. To her, the journey – and everything along the way – is as exciting as the destination.
Whether being silly, throwing a tantrum, or banging a drum, your child may seem like a revved-up ball of energy with an uncanny ability to keep going and going. That's actually a good thing, because kids learn through repetition.
But because children this age live so much in the moment, your 21-month-old has a hard time shifting gears from one activity or mood to another. He just can't stop himself when he's on a roll. You may even notice this tendency in your child's fine motor skills. He might scribble right off the paper or paint his arms or the easel as well as the drawing pad in front of him.
The typical 21-month-old has developed some decent self-feeding skills – like filling a spoon with food and getting it into his mouth, spearing food with a fork, and drinking from a cup. Whether your toddler is willing to use those skills consistently at the family table is another story.
Depending on your child's temperament, he may already be turning into a much tidier eater – or far from it. By his second birthday, he might find it distressing to spill a drink or get food on his hands or clothes. On the other hand, he might continue to use food like finger paint for months to come.
-BabyCenter.com
Whether being silly, throwing a tantrum, or banging a drum, your child may seem like a revved-up ball of energy with an uncanny ability to keep going and going. That's actually a good thing, because kids learn through repetition.
But because children this age live so much in the moment, your 21-month-old has a hard time shifting gears from one activity or mood to another. He just can't stop himself when he's on a roll. You may even notice this tendency in your child's fine motor skills. He might scribble right off the paper or paint his arms or the easel as well as the drawing pad in front of him.
The typical 21-month-old has developed some decent self-feeding skills – like filling a spoon with food and getting it into his mouth, spearing food with a fork, and drinking from a cup. Whether your toddler is willing to use those skills consistently at the family table is another story.
Depending on your child's temperament, he may already be turning into a much tidier eater – or far from it. By his second birthday, he might find it distressing to spill a drink or get food on his hands or clothes. On the other hand, he might continue to use food like finger paint for months to come.
-BabyCenter.com
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Baby This Week: 1 Week Old
For now, your newborn sleeps most of the day and feeds every two to three hours. Babies are born with many automatic reflexes that help them make the transition to life outside the womb. Stroke her cheek, and she'll turn her head toward your finger and move her mouth as if groping for a nipple. If you hold her upright, she'll move her legs as if walking. Most of these automatic reflexes disappear within weeks of birth.
Because she was curled up inside your uterus until recently, your newborn baby will probably look scrunched up for a while, with her arms and legs not fully extended. She may even appear bowlegged.
Don't worry: Your baby will stretch out, little by little, and by the time she reaches 6 months, she'll be fully unfurled! In the meantime, as she adjusts to life outside the warm, safe confines of your womb, she may enjoy being swaddled in a light blanket.
- BabyCenter.com
Because she was curled up inside your uterus until recently, your newborn baby will probably look scrunched up for a while, with her arms and legs not fully extended. She may even appear bowlegged.
Don't worry: Your baby will stretch out, little by little, and by the time she reaches 6 months, she'll be fully unfurled! In the meantime, as she adjusts to life outside the warm, safe confines of your womb, she may enjoy being swaddled in a light blanket.
- BabyCenter.com
Emmy one week old.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Abuelita and Tia Tati
My mom and my sister Cathy (or as Mila calls her, "Tia Tati") came by for a visit. They have been amazing. They've been staying over on the weekends and helping us get adjusted with the two girls and making sure Mila has plenty of attention. It's been wonderful!
Emmy 5 days old!
Plus, Cathy has been cooking all weekend and making the most delicious meals! Heaven!!
She looks so different after her bath, doesn't she??
Friday, October 14, 2011
Siblings :)
Since I just blogged about Mila and Emmy meeting for the first time, I thought I'd share a pic of Jorge and I with our siblings when we were kids. :)
My mom bringing my little sister Cathy home from the hospital. Cathy and I are 18 months apart.
Love this!
Big sister Blanca with baby Jorge. Blanca and Jorge are 21 months apart - the exact age difference between Mila and Emmy! So sweet!
Toddler This Week: 21 Months, Week 2
Your toddler's personality is becoming more apparent every day. At the playground, does he run straight for the swings, seesaw, or slide without a second glance at the other kids? Or is he more circumspect, sticking close to you and sizing up the situation before settling on what to do? Understanding your toddler's reactions to new situations will help you prepare your child for preschool and other activities.
Sharing isn't one of your child's strong suits. Don't expect her to master this social grace until later. Right now your toddler is just learning about ownership: "Mine!" She isn't inclined to hand over her possessions, partly because she doesn't have a good understanding of time (when will I get it back?) or reciprocity (you do something for me, I'll do something for you).
Praise your child when you see her offering a toy to a friend or a baby. Model sharing, and use words that help your child understand what it means. For example, try asking if you can play with something she's playing with. If she protests, don't force it. Just say, "Can I have a turn?" With this back and forth, your toddler will start to get an idea of what sharing means.
Don't insist on sharing or set up turn-taking during playdates. Nor is it a good idea to hand over your child's toys to a visitor. Put out toys with lots of pieces (like blocks), and let the kids work out who uses what as much as possible.
Criticize behavior when you must, but avoid criticizing your child. Pointing fingers does little to teach proper behavior. Try phrasing statements to make clear which behaviors you like and which you don't: "I don't like that screechy noise you're making. Please use a quiet inside voice, like this." "I don't like it when you unroll the whole roll of toilet paper." "I like it when you come right away when I call you."
-BabyCenter.com
Sharing isn't one of your child's strong suits. Don't expect her to master this social grace until later. Right now your toddler is just learning about ownership: "Mine!" She isn't inclined to hand over her possessions, partly because she doesn't have a good understanding of time (when will I get it back?) or reciprocity (you do something for me, I'll do something for you).
Praise your child when you see her offering a toy to a friend or a baby. Model sharing, and use words that help your child understand what it means. For example, try asking if you can play with something she's playing with. If she protests, don't force it. Just say, "Can I have a turn?" With this back and forth, your toddler will start to get an idea of what sharing means.
Don't insist on sharing or set up turn-taking during playdates. Nor is it a good idea to hand over your child's toys to a visitor. Put out toys with lots of pieces (like blocks), and let the kids work out who uses what as much as possible.
Criticize behavior when you must, but avoid criticizing your child. Pointing fingers does little to teach proper behavior. Try phrasing statements to make clear which behaviors you like and which you don't: "I don't like that screechy noise you're making. Please use a quiet inside voice, like this." "I don't like it when you unroll the whole roll of toilet paper." "I like it when you come right away when I call you."
-BabyCenter.com
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Emmy Popeye
Emmy is so funny. She does this thing where she usually opens one eye first and then the other. It's so cute! I told Jorge I think she reminds me of Popeye... and then I made up a song about it. LOL!
(To the tune of "Popeye the Sailor Man")
Soy Emmy Popeye, si.
Me gusta la leche, si.
Con un ojo abierto, yo como y duermo,
soy Emmy Popeye, si!
(I'm Emmy Popeye, that's me.
I love milk, I do.
I sleep and eat with one eye open,
I'm Emmy Popeye, that's me!)
(To the tune of "Popeye the Sailor Man")
Soy Emmy Popeye, si.
Me gusta la leche, si.
Con un ojo abierto, yo como y duermo,
soy Emmy Popeye, si!
(I'm Emmy Popeye, that's me.
I love milk, I do.
I sleep and eat with one eye open,
I'm Emmy Popeye, that's me!)
Mila Meets Her Little Sister!
We brought Emmy home today!! We were so excited for her to meet her big sister! We'd been away from Mila for the last couple of days and she'd been staying with Jorge's sister Blanca and my mom at our place. I was so happy to see my little girl again! I'd never been away from her overnight before and I was nervous she'd have a hard time, but she seemed to have done well.
Leading up to the birth, we'd been telling Mila about the baby and that she would soon be a big sister. We'd heard how stressful the change can be for a child to suddenly have a new baby in the house so we tried to tell her about it as much as possible. We'd gotten her a book about it in spanish, "Soy Una Hermana Mayor!" which Mia looooves and makes us read it to her over and over again. Our intention was to prepare her as much as possible for Emmy's arrival and hope for the best! And it seemed to have worked well - Mila seemed both curious and excited about her little sister. She kept looking at her and expressing concern to straighten Emmys head if it drooped to one side - so sweet! I think she thought Emmy was a doll, LOL!
Here's a clip of our arrival home with Emmy. I was tearing up when Mila first saw her!
Leading up to the birth, we'd been telling Mila about the baby and that she would soon be a big sister. We'd heard how stressful the change can be for a child to suddenly have a new baby in the house so we tried to tell her about it as much as possible. We'd gotten her a book about it in spanish, "Soy Una Hermana Mayor!" which Mia looooves and makes us read it to her over and over again. Our intention was to prepare her as much as possible for Emmy's arrival and hope for the best! And it seemed to have worked well - Mila seemed both curious and excited about her little sister. She kept looking at her and expressing concern to straighten Emmys head if it drooped to one side - so sweet! I think she thought Emmy was a doll, LOL!
The car ride home... look at those little legs!
Sleepy
Me and my Mila! How I missed her!
Mila sees Emmy as we walk in...
Look at that face!! So excited!
Mila signing that baby is sleeping.
Our new little family! :)
Emmy - Day 3 at the Hospital
When Mila was born, I was really against co-sleeping. Instead, Mila would wake up in the night, I get up and nurse her in the living room, and then gently tip-toe back to her bassinet to put her down and pray, pray, PRAAAY she not wake up as I lay her down. Most times, she'd wake right back up. Then we'd have to rock her back to sleep. Then by the time she'd fall asleep, it was time to nurse again!!! It was absolute torture. I remember waking up at night to nurse and she would wake up for the zillionth time and I would just cry because I was so sleep deprived! I was terribly unhappy. :(
Then Jorge went out of town for a week for work when Mila was about 3 months old. My mom came over and stayed in the guest room (which was Mila's room, but she didn't sleep there yet - she slept in our room in her bassinet.) Mila woke up and I tried to go through our usual routine of getting up to nurse her and praying she'd stay asleep as I put her back into bed. Of course, she woke up. In desperation, since I had the whole bed to myself, I took her into my bed and nursed her - and I fell asleep along with her. It was the best night's sleep I'd gotten in months. I couldn't believe it. I had been so scared to even try sleeping with her that I didn't even give myself a chance to see if it could work for us.
And that's how our co-sleeping began. I would nurse her and put her into her crib around 11pm and then when she'd wake up at 3 or 4am, I'd take her to the guest bed and nurse her there. It took a long while for Jorge to be comfortable with it. He realized that it was really working for us - that we were all sleeping SO much better - but I could tell he wasn't thrilled with the idea. He was never ok to stay in bed with us, either I would take Mila to the guest bed and sleep with her there, or he would go to the other room. She stopped waking up in the middle of the night to nurse relatively quickly, maybe around 7/8 months or so? And that's when the co-sleeping ended.
This time around - I have 2 kids to take care of. I need to be well rested. I can't be a zombie chasing after a toddler and taking care of a newborn! So this time, I figured I roll with whatever worked.
When Emmy was born, we were already 2 days of not being well-rested from being in labor Sunday night and Monday night. Tuesday night was our first night with her, and it was a bit rough. Aside from Emmy sleeping all day and being up most of the night, it didn't help that when we were able to get some sleep, the nurses are coming in and out checking me and checking the baby. Now Wednesday night - we were really starting to lose it! Emmy would cry whenever we put her into her little cubby - she hated it! So as we tried to calm her down, Jorge handed her to me in the bed and immediately, she stopped. She wanted to be with Mommy! Once she fell asleep, we tried moving her back to the cubby but she only stayed asleep briefly before she woke up again.
That's it! I positioned myself to make her a little nook and put my arms in such a way where I was holding her propped up by pillows. She was swaddled, so she couldn't really move. She quickly went back to sleep... and I dozed off.
Now, I know we've all heard horror stories about co-sleeping. But if you do it safely, it really is a very healthy and bonding experience. I do wake up a bit stiff, but at least we're all getting some much needed shut-eye. :)
Here are a few articles I read that were very helpful and informative, in case you want to learn more about it.
http://birthwithoutfearblog.com/2011/11/17/cosleeping-fear-mongering-flawed-research-and-how-to-cosleep-safely/
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/sleep-problems/co-sleeping-yes-no-sometimes
http://neuroanthropology.net/2008/12/21/cosleeping-and-biological-imperatives-why-human-babies-do-not-and-should-not-sleep-alone/
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/sleep-problems/sids-latest-research-how-sleeping-your-baby-safe
Then Jorge went out of town for a week for work when Mila was about 3 months old. My mom came over and stayed in the guest room (which was Mila's room, but she didn't sleep there yet - she slept in our room in her bassinet.) Mila woke up and I tried to go through our usual routine of getting up to nurse her and praying she'd stay asleep as I put her back into bed. Of course, she woke up. In desperation, since I had the whole bed to myself, I took her into my bed and nursed her - and I fell asleep along with her. It was the best night's sleep I'd gotten in months. I couldn't believe it. I had been so scared to even try sleeping with her that I didn't even give myself a chance to see if it could work for us.
And that's how our co-sleeping began. I would nurse her and put her into her crib around 11pm and then when she'd wake up at 3 or 4am, I'd take her to the guest bed and nurse her there. It took a long while for Jorge to be comfortable with it. He realized that it was really working for us - that we were all sleeping SO much better - but I could tell he wasn't thrilled with the idea. He was never ok to stay in bed with us, either I would take Mila to the guest bed and sleep with her there, or he would go to the other room. She stopped waking up in the middle of the night to nurse relatively quickly, maybe around 7/8 months or so? And that's when the co-sleeping ended.
This time around - I have 2 kids to take care of. I need to be well rested. I can't be a zombie chasing after a toddler and taking care of a newborn! So this time, I figured I roll with whatever worked.
When Emmy was born, we were already 2 days of not being well-rested from being in labor Sunday night and Monday night. Tuesday night was our first night with her, and it was a bit rough. Aside from Emmy sleeping all day and being up most of the night, it didn't help that when we were able to get some sleep, the nurses are coming in and out checking me and checking the baby. Now Wednesday night - we were really starting to lose it! Emmy would cry whenever we put her into her little cubby - she hated it! So as we tried to calm her down, Jorge handed her to me in the bed and immediately, she stopped. She wanted to be with Mommy! Once she fell asleep, we tried moving her back to the cubby but she only stayed asleep briefly before she woke up again.
That's it! I positioned myself to make her a little nook and put my arms in such a way where I was holding her propped up by pillows. She was swaddled, so she couldn't really move. She quickly went back to sleep... and I dozed off.
Cuddled up with my little sweetie. :)
Now, I know we've all heard horror stories about co-sleeping. But if you do it safely, it really is a very healthy and bonding experience. I do wake up a bit stiff, but at least we're all getting some much needed shut-eye. :)
Here are a few articles I read that were very helpful and informative, in case you want to learn more about it.
http://birthwithoutfearblog.com/2011/11/17/cosleeping-fear-mongering-flawed-research-and-how-to-cosleep-safely/
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/sleep-problems/co-sleeping-yes-no-sometimes
http://neuroanthropology.net/2008/12/21/cosleeping-and-biological-imperatives-why-human-babies-do-not-and-should-not-sleep-alone/
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/sleep-problems/sids-latest-research-how-sleeping-your-baby-safe
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Emmy - Day 2 at the Hospital
Napping on mommy. Look how tiny she is! :)
Emmy sleeping.
Daddy burping Emmy.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Emmy Sophia is here!
38 weeks, 5 days pregnant
(Please note, this is my daughter's birth story and I'm writing it so I can remember every single detail of that day. This is a disclaimer that there are descriptions and pictures that may be a bit graphic, and while I'm happy to share it with you, if you'd rather not see this, please feel free skip this post. Thank you!)
Our little Emmy Sophia is here! She was born Tuesday, October 11th, 2011 at 11:21am. She was born completely naturally and without complications and weighed 6 pounds, 14 ounces and was 19 inches long. Below is the story of her arrival...
It's been a long two days - yes - two days in labor! I was always told that labor for the second child is always faster than the first, and my midwife and my doula were telling me this one will probably go faster - and Mila was born fast herself! (With Mila, contractions started at 1am, my water broke at 4am and she was born at 10:57am.) So we were all pretty nervous that things could go faster than we might anticipate.
Contractions Begin - Monday, October 10th, 2011
It all started early Monday morning. I woke up around 4am. I was feeling some contractions and at first, I ignored them and tried to fall back asleep. When I couldn't, I thought maybe we should start timing them, just to make sure. Jorge had installed an app on his iPad called Contraction Timer. I liked this app better than the one we used with Mila on the Blackberry the last time around. This one not only measures how far apart the contractions are, but also how intense they are. They were about 7 minutes apart but not that intense, so I thought I should shower, just in case this was the real deal. I remember being in the shower and it suddenly hitting me that this could actually be it and that my baby would be born today! As I got out of the shower, I felt really cold and I felt a rush of adrenaline. I started shaking so bad that my teeth were literally chattering and I started breathing really heavy. As I warmed up and got dressed, I continued to time my contractions. I realized that the intensity had gone down a bit and that they weren't happening as frequently. I've read that when you get excited/scared during labor and it causes an adrenaline rush, that it can actually turn off your labor. It's your body going into survival mode! Pretty clever, the body is. I was hoping this wasn't the case though. As nervous as I was to go into labor, I wanted it to happen already!
During my shower, Jorge called his sister, Blanca, to come over. She would be the one staying with Mila while we are at the hospital. Also, as luck would have it, we have our apartment listed for sale and we had a showing that afternoon to a potential buyer that has seen our place 3 times already and wanted to see it again during the day and once again at night to see the view from our balcony. So happy to have someone interested in our place, but not so happy that it just so happens to be the very same day I'm in labor!
We called my doula to give her an update on what was going on. Now, I've been a little anxious about my doula situation because I really, really wanted my doula from last time, Lorie. But her son's wife was going to be giving birth to her first grandson just around this time and there was a slight chance that she might be out of town when I went into labor. For that reason, I had picked a back up doula - and I felt sooo much better. Stacy was really just as fantastic as Lorie. I really wanted Lorie mostly because she'd been there with me last time and she knew what I liked, but I was comfortable with them both. Anyway, I called her to tell her what was going on and to see if she was in town. Luckily, she was - and she told me she'd be in town until the following evening, Tuesday night! YES!! I told her what I was feeling and she agreed that maybe the adrenaline had slowed down my labor a little bit, but based on how frequently they were coming and that they were still a bit intense, that I should call my midwife's office to let them know.
Ugh. I really didn't want to call the office. I knew who would be on call. The midwife practice I use has 3 midwives. I have my regular midwife, Terry, who delivered Mila and I love her. She's the one I usually go see. The other two are nice too, but I don't know them as well, and one of them I really don't feel like I have a connection with her. I mean, she's nice and all, I just don't feel a connection, ya know? The day I go into labor, it's the luck of the draw though - whichever one that's on call would be the one to deliver G2. And Terry was on call only 1 day this week! And of course, the midwife that happened to be on call yesterday was the one I didn't connect with! Figures!!
I procrastinated a bit and finally called. The contractions were a bit close together again though, about 7-8 minutes apart or so. She thought it might still be early labor, but since we live 45 minutes away from the midwife's office and from the hospital we want to deliver at, she thought it was best we should go to the office to get checked to see how I was progressing. I was so reluctant to go. I didn't want to drive all the way to the office 45 minutes away especially when I didn't feel like I was that far along and I soooo didn't want to get checked. It's absolutely awful! She said to be there at 10:30am. Ugh. I swear, I dragged my feet. I kept myself busy by doing my hair, my makeup, calling my parents and my sisters... I knew that I wasn't that far along. If I was still capable of talking and dilly dallying then I KNEW I wasn't that far along yet. (When I went into labor with Mila, by the time I left for the hospital, I couldn't hold a conversation, I didn't want to eat, I just wanted to be in the dark cuddled in the bed! I couldn't even comb my hair after getting out of the shower - forget blowdrying and straightening it! And when I got to the hospital that time, I was already 9cm!)
Jorge had been packing up the car this whole time. We made sure to pack light this time because with Mila we packed waaaay too much. But by the time we finished packing up the car, it somehow didn't seem very "light", LOL!
Thankfully, Mila slept in a bit and by the time we left, around 9:45am, she was just waking up. We thought it was best to leave before she saw us, then she wouldn't have a chance to fuss (not that she normally does - but it's not every day that both mom and dad leave together so early in the morning without spending any time with her). We drove to the doctor's office. I knew there was a playdate with our mommy friends scheduled for that day, so on our way there, I called Heike to tell her what was going on. She was so excited for us! I was so happy to share this with her and the mommies - they've been there with me every step of the way!
At My Midwife's Office
We arrived at the office and the midwife saw me pretty quickly. I was so stressed about getting checked. It was more dreadful than I remember. It was still early and my cervix was high (read: that she has to go in further to feel for my cervix --- OUCH!!!!) and that I was 80% effaced (or thinned out), but only 2cm dilated. 2cm!!!!!! I was so pissed! I knew it was early!! She said that it's possible that the contractions continue and that I could go into labor later in the day, or they could stop and the baby wouldn't arrive until next week!! (When I told this part of the story to my mommy friend Spencer, she suggested that perhaps since this wasn't one of the midwives I preferred, that my cervix closed itself in protest! Oh my goodness - that made me laugh!! ) The midwife told me that although they tell first time moms to go to the hospital at 6 minutes apart, that for second time moms, it's not just the frequency of the contractions that matters, but the intensity. That for second time moms one could actually deliver at 6/7 minutes apart if they were strong enough. So she told me to make sure I kept track of the intensity as well, and she sent me home. Good to know!
Sent Home
We left the office at 11:30am and I called Lorie my doula, my parents, my sisters and the mommies with the update. So bummed. After being checked, the contractions slowed down to 8-9 minutes apart and the intensity decreased as well. We stopped and picked up Pollo Tropical for lunch, stopped at The Floridian to pick up some french toast I was craving (I was hungry? Definitely not that far along!) and then we went home and ate lunch with Blanca and Mila. The people that went to see our apartment had just left. After lunch, I laid down to rest. I was so tired and sleepy - I hadn't slept much that night! Jorge tried catching up on work, since he had taken the day off and wanted to get ahead in case the baby would be coming soon. Thankfully, Blanca was there to entertain Mila until her nap time. I was so tired! All this time, I'm still feeling contractions, they just are pretty manageable. Contractions are still 8-9 minutes apart, but not very intense.
After her nap, Mila played for a bit and then we went to Jack's hamburger place for dinner.Yep, there I was eating a burger and having contractions at Jacks! LOL!
Later That Night
That night, I went to bed and I was still feeling contractions. I texted Lorie with an update. Not much progress, that I thought it was pretty uneventful for now and nothing much to report. Then right before I went to bed I went to pee and I saw what I'm pretty sure was my mucous plug! (I know - TMI!) That's not too much of an indicator on it's own, but along with the other symptoms, I knew this might mean things were still going on. The contractions were about 8-9 minutes apart or so (which is still far apart) but they were getting a little more intense. I even wondered if they would let me sleep? Thankfully, I was able to sleep about an hour and a half before they got strong enough to wake me up....
Tuesday, October 11th, 2011
I woke up around 2:30am and Jorge had to talk me through a few contractions. They were surprisingly intense! It felt like really, really bad cramps. I called Lorie to update her. I had felt a little bit of pressure like I had to poop (which was alarming because that's similar to the feeling of pushing!), but later I realized it was just gas! LOL!
I told her I wasn't sure if this was really it and that I was nervous about getting to the hospital too early. I didn't want to be there any longer than I had to! She reminded me that if we did get there early, that I could always labor in the labor pool. That made me feel better. I didn't call my midwife's office right away though - I wanted to make sure this was really it.
We called Blanca so she could stay with Mila and she arrived quickly. It was about 5:00am by then. I waited an hour or so and once I saw the contractions were consistently intense, I called the midwife's office. Although the on call midwife still wasn't Terry (my usual midwife), the one that was was other midwife that I had connected with, Rachel. Although contractions were still about 7-8 minutes apart, she thought the intensity warranted that we should start heading out before rush hour. Since Jorge had packed up the car the morning before when we thought it was the real deal, there wasn't much left to put together, except for the small day-to-day stuff that we needed for the night (toothbrushes, slippers, chargers, etc.) and Jorge quickly got our stuff together.
Leaving for the Hospital
We finally left around 6:20am. The first elevator to get to our floor was the service elevator. On the way down, Jorge realized he forgot his cell phone, so I got off on the first floor and he went back up. I made my way slowly to the car and I had to stop and lean up against the wall during one of the contractions. I had just made it to the car when he came back down. Jorge had removed Mila's car seat from the backseat so I could lie down back there with my pillow. Contractions were getting so intense, I could no longer sit through them, I had to be lying down. I was still able to hold a bit of conversation between contractions, but when one came along, they were about an 8/9 intensity (out of 10) and I needed Jorge to talk me through them. They were intense!! I really wasn't in the mood to talk too much, so I sent out a text to my parents and my sister Cathy saying we were on our way to the hospital, but that I still thought there was plenty of time. No rush. (My mom and Cathy live an hour and a half from the hospital and I knew they had to work. I didn't want them to get there just to have to wait.) My dad called me to see how I was doing and we talked briefly, but then I felt a contraction coming and I cut him off with, "Contraction coming... I gotta go!" and I practically hung up on him! After that contraction was over, I texted my sister Cindy and Lorie to tell her we were on the way so they could meet us at the hospital.
At the Hospital
We got to the hospital pretty fast, at about 7am. It was still dark out. By this time, I'd gotten pretty comfortable in my position in the back seat of the car. I really didn't want to move, much less get up, walk, and go inside, so Jorge just parked. Lorie got there just a few minutes after we did and got into the car. I gave her an update on how I was feeling. I told her I didn't want to go into the hospital. I just wanted to stay in the car for a bit longer. I was afraid to go in if I wasn't that far along that they'd try to push drugs on me, that I couldn't eat/drink anything once I was admitted, that they'd hook me up to machines, etc... She was totally fine giving me time. She said we were in the middle of a shift change with the nurses anyway, so it would be fine to wait. She texted to find out who was working and requested we get a nurse that she knew was natural birth friendly. My sister Cindy arrived shortly afterward. In between contractions we talked about using the labor pool. I brought up again that I was nervous how that would work out... the hospital doesn't technically "allow" water births. They let you labor in the water, but they want you to get out before pushing. But at what point do they get you out? What if I don't want to get out? This really stressed me out. I know it's safe - I've researched it extensively - the hospital even already has guidelines written up on it, they just haven't signed off on it. So frustrating. Why couldn't I have the birth I wanted? I told Lorie wishfully, "It's my dream to have a water birth!" but in my mind I had already resigned myself to the fact that it wouldn't happen. She smiled, "Maybe for your next baby?"
I'd had a few more strong contractions in the car, and with that, Lorie then suggested we go inside. She pointed out that it seemed like the contractions were getting closer together and, again, she reminded me I would be more comfortable laboring in the water. I finally agreed.
Jorge pulled up the car to the entrance and Lorie helped me out. Cindy helped bring in our stuff and took some pictures while Jorge parked the car. I was so uncomfortable to be standing at this point. Lorie needed to help me walk. I had to stop a couple of times to get through contractions. They were so strong! And then I had to stop at the bathroom to pee - of course my bladder barely holds anything!
We went up the elevator and stopped at the security desk where they got us a wheel chair. They wheeled me in, just like they did almost two years ago when I was in labor with Mila. We passed Room 10 where Mila was born and went into the other large suite, Room 7. The room looked almost exactly like Mila's labor room did. It brought back so many memories! This time I felt so much more conscious and aware of what was going on. With Mila, I was way too far along to really pay attention to anything except for the contractions. I was nervous and excited - "This is where my baby will be born!" I thought, excitedly.
We got situated in the room and Beth, the RN Lorie had requested, came in. She was fantastic. She introduced herself and the very first thing she did was ask me about my Birth Plan. I was so happy she asked! I can't tell you how many stories I've read where the nursing staff roll their eyes at Birth Plans - much less ask to see one! I know that if anything should go wrong, that my Birth Plan goes out the window - but if it doesn't, then there are things I would prefer. Like I don't want to be connected to an IV (hep block instead if needed), intermittent fetal monitoring (instead of continuous) so that I'm free to walk around, I didn't want my membranes swept or my water broken or any drugs to speed up labor (like pitocin or anything like that). I also had requests for after the baby was born: we wanted to delay clamping the umbilical cord until it stopped pulsating on it's own so that all the blood in the placenta could go back into her, we wanted immediate skin to skin bonding after the birth (instead of them taking her away to get bathed and poked and prodded), we didn't want them to give her the standard Hepatitis B shot (this is spread by unsafe sex... she doesn't need this at birth!) or put in the standard eye ointment (that's only for women with gonorrhea or chlamydia, but they give to babies as part of routine care. We'd rather her not get something doesn't need it.) Also, it was very important for me that she stay in the room with us the whole time (not to be taken to the nursery) and should there be anything that needs to be done anywhere other than in our room, that Jorge should be able to be with her (not outside the room looking through a glass - but either holding her or right next to her. We want her to have her parents with her at all times.) You can read my full birth plan here.
Nurse Beth read the birth plan, which had already been signed by my midwife, and said everything looked good. Next, she had to check how dilated I was - which I HATE! Especially after being checked the day before and it being so painful! I braced myself and hoped there was progress... I was 5 cm. I was so surprised! I thought I was more! Beth was encouraging though. "It's the first five that take the longest... the next five are faster."
Lorie was just about done with the tub, so I changed into my bathing suit top so I could get in the water. It was about 9am. Even though I had planned to get into the water the whole time, I was a bit reluctant. What if I didn't like being in the water? I didn't want to be wet and cold if I decided to get out. I thought I'd give it a try. Who knows, maybe I'd really like it? I got in and oh my goodness... I was so glad I did! It was so warm and relaxing. I asked they dim the lights. I wanted it to be dark. Someone closed the curtains, as the sun was already coming up. Lorie set up her iPod with relaxing music and I was in heaven... well, aside from the painful contractions, that is! It was so easy to change positions, move around and I didn't feel my weight. It took me a bit to find my spot in the tub though. I didn't know what position to get into. On land, my favorite laboring position was lying on my side, and after trying out a few spots, being on my side was the best in the water too. There was a little cushy stool at one end of the pool and I used that to rest my top knee, and I wrapped my arms around the side of the pool.
Time passed, maybe another hour or so and the contractions were getting stronger and stronger and closer together. Beth, the nurse, would check the babies' heartbeat with a portable monitor on top of my belly.
I suddenly had the urge to pee. Lorie said I could go ahead and pee in the tub if I wanted. After all, pee is sterile. But - yuck! - I couldn't bring myself to doing it. To sit in my own pee? For who knows how long? I told her I wanted to use the bathroom instead. I waited until the next contraction was over and she helped me to the bathroom. It was literally 3 steps away from the tub and Lorie was right there with me - I had another contraction while sitting there! As soon as the contraction was over, I heard a tiny trickle... and I was almost sure it wasn't pee. Could it be my water, I wondered? I don't think Lorie noticed and I decided not to say anything. I was afraid that if anyone had any idea that my water was breaking or was broken, that I wouldn't let me back in the water - and I desperately wanted to get back in! At this time, I felt if I had stayed on the toilet for another contraction my water would really break. (Did you know the toilet is a very common and very helpful place to labor? The toilet would have definitely been my next best spot to labor in, had I not had the tub.) Sitting in the bathroom, I wasn't thinking so far ahead that I wanted to deliver in the water - I just wanted to be in it for the next contraction! It felt so good and it was so incredibly helpful! I couldn't imagine having to find another "spot" that I felt as comfortable in as I did then. Obviously, no one knows which contraction will bring on the urge to push, but I didn't care - I just wanted to be in the water when the next one hit. As soon as I got back in the water, I felt better. My mind started racing - it hit me that I wanted to have to have this baby here, in the water. I didn't want to get out again and I was afraid that they were going to ask me to get out at any moment. The contractions were really getting strong and I knew the end was soon.
During all of this, I have no idea that no one in the room has any clue how far along I am. When I have a contraction, it's not like what you see on TV. I'm not screaming, I'm not going into hysterics - I'm the complete opposite. The more you do those things - screaming, yelling, tensing up - the more the contractions hurt. In our Bradley Childbirth class, we were taught to close your eyes, relax and not fight the contractions so it would be easier to manage. So when Jorge, Lorie, Cindy and Beth saw me, all they saw was me lying quietly in the water - Jorge later said it looked almost like I was sleeping. (HA!) During contractions, I was doing my best to relax and focus on Jorge's voice...but inside, I was struggling - the water helped tremendously, but the pain was still incredible! I was using every ounce of energy I had to try not to fight it, not to tense up. I was so worried they knew how far along I was and they would ask me to get out at any minute... But I didn't realize it until afterwards, that although I knew it was getting close - from their perspective, they didn't.
It was getting harder and harder to stay relaxed during the contractions. Jorge was doing such a great job reassuring me, reminding m to relax my face and not to clench my jaw. He would tell me that it would be over soon, that the baby would soon be in my arms, that today would soon be yesterday, and what a good job I was doing... He was so encouraging and motivating. How I love my husband!! It also helped me to think of the baby using her name... it made it feel more real, and more connected to her.
I heard Rachel, my midwife that I'd spoken to on the phone earlier, come in. She gently asked me how I was feeling. I was doing fine. Beth checked the babies' heartbeat again. Baby was doing well too. Rachel encouraged me to take a few sips of water and I did.
More time passed and I realized I had to pee again. I wanted to go to the bathroom, but I wanted to wait until Rachel left. I was afraid my water would break and she wouldn't let me back in the tub. I would open my eyes every once in a while to check, and she was still there in the room. As if she could read my mind, Rachel suggested I go to the bathroom to try and labor there. I was convinced she had been telling me to drink because she was trying to get me out of the water! I kept telling her I would go later. I was waiting for her to leave the room! The contractions were so strong now, that I KNEW if I had one on the toilet, my water would most certainly break. I had to pee sooo bad! After a few very strong contractions, I felt slight pressure and the urge to push a little. Rachel again suggested I try laboring on the toilet. Again, I say, "Not yet." Ugh! If she only knew!
This entire time, I've had my eyes closed and I'm very focused inwards. I've been in my zone and not very aware what's going on with everyone - except for knowing Rachel was still in the room. I was so far in my labor trance, I didn't even notice when my mom arrived. I just opened my eyes briefly after a contraction, and there she was, smiling at me. I don't know how long she had been there. I was so surprised and relieved to see her. I was glad she would be there for the birth! I love my mom - even though I had told her earlier that morning not to rush over (I knew she had to work that morning and I didn't want her sitting around waiting for hours - who knew how long this would take?) she did anyway - and there she was.
Back again with my eyes closed, I suddenly hear very soft whispering. It was Lorie. I wasn't sure what she was saying, all I heard her say was, "... it's her dream! ..." I realized she was talking to Rachel, and they were discussing the possibility of me delivering in the water. I don't know what Rachel responded, all I heard was a soft murmur, but her tone did not sound angry or insistent. I took that as a sign. Ok, I thought, I don't know how much longer I could keep waiting.... time to fess up.
The next time she suggested I go to the bathroom, I waited a few moments, and while still in my trance-like state with my eyes closed, I said, "Honestly, I'm afraid if I go to the bathroom, you're not going to let me back in the water..." I had my eyes closed, so I didn't know what her reaction was. I just waited for a response.
Silence.
Finally, Rachel responded matter-of-factly, "As of right now, I don't have any reason not to let you back in."
That's when it hit me - she doesn't know how far along I am! I'm already feeling the urge to push! I kinda had the feeling she was being flexible and accommodating with me, but I wasn't entirely sure. I had to pee so bad though - I took that as the response I wanted to hear. I said I'd go after the next contraction. Lorie again helped me to the bathroom. As soon as I was done peeing, another contraction hit. I put my arms around her shoulders, holding on to her. I struggled to relax and not fight it. A moment later, we both heard a small trickle and I knew it wasn't pee. Lorie asked, "Connie, is that your water?" I listened to the trickle. "No, I don't feel anything. I think it's the toilet making a noise," I said. I really thought it was the toilet. We listened again. Lorie said with a laugh, "No, Connie, that's your water!" I panicked a little. I whispered in her ear, "Lorie, it was trickling the last time I was in the bathroom... And the last contraction I had just now in the water - I was already feeling the urge to push!" She barely had a chance to respond with a, "Don't worry, you're doing fine," when another contraction came and it was really intense. Still sitting on the toilet, I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and tried to relax ... within a few seconds there was a super loud POP! and followed by a GUSH! Lorie exclaimed, "Your water just broke!" It sounded like it literally EXPLODED! It was so loud everyone heard it! Lorie said quickly, "Come on - let's get you back in the water!"
As I took those few steps back to the pool, another contraction came as I was putting my leg over into the pool. I tried to balance myself and my extra large belly carefully into the pool and quickly get back into my comfort position. But it was too late - this contraction was killer as I tried to get on my side - and I felt the urge to push again. I had a couple of minutes to think about pushing... what position was I going to get into? I was so comfortable on my side, but I didn't think that I could push that way. I attempted to change positions, but I didn't like it and went back to my side. Another contraction. This time, it was a real doozy. I then felt the urge to push and I pushed!! I felt that all familiar "ring of fire" feeling as the baby's head was crowning. (I remember feeling like it wasn't as bad as I remember it being with Mila. Probably because of the water?) It hurt so bad that for the first time during a contraction, I yelled. Even though my eyes were closed, I noticed the whole room startle. Everyone seemed surprised! I felt the baby's head come out. Lorie turned me from my side to my back and explained this would be a better position. She held me up under my arms as the next contraction came less than a minute later and I had a HUUUUGE urge to push. I remember thinking briefly that I probably shouldn't push too hard so that I wouldn't risk a tear, but I couldn't help it! I just wanted to get this over with! I wanted the baby out NOW!!! And another screaming push later - the baby was out! Rachel grabbed the baby and immediately pulled her out of the water. Lorie was saying excitedly, "Connie, open your eyes! You did it! Take the baby!" Rachel had her ready to hand to me and I put her on my chest. I was so overwhelmed - I was so happy it was over! I was out of breath and still gathering myself... I couldn't believe I did this... AGAIN!
The baby was just beautiful. She was quiet at first, and we rubbed her to stimulate her and that made her cry. If you're not familiar with water births, it's entirely safe and there is never any risk to drowning or to inhaling any water as long as mom and baby are still attached and the baby hasn't yet taken it's first breath. Remember, the baby is coming from being in water inside the uterus into a water environment. They will continue to get oxygen through the umbilical cord until they take in their first breath of air. Once that happens, they stop getting it through the umbilical cord.
Jorge was ecstatic. He was kissing me and helping me hold the baby. I was still recovering from that last contraction and was cringing a little because the baby was still attached to me through the umbilical cord and I could feel it was a bit taught and as it tugged, it was very uncomfortable.
I remember looking at her - she was so precious! I felt I could just barely enjoy her though... I was so overwhelmed with what had just happened. I had barely made it back into the tub and then the contractions were just so intense... I was almost out of breath. Things started moving fast after that. Rachel wanted to make sure the placenta was ok so she wanted to get me out of the water quickly and onto the bed. I was trying to tell them that I needed a minute before I could stand up, but of course - how could I ask for more than what they had already given me?!
Emmy had been on my chest this whole time, but I didn't realize that my wet bathing suit was underneath her. Beth took her temperature and she was a bit cold, so she put her in the warmer and took her to get weighed. I loved that she did all the baby care in the room, right there with us!
Finally! The worst part was over! I had been afraid of this birth because Mila's birth had been so perfect that I thought Emmy's would have more challenges. But I was wrong! It was perfect and special in it's own way. I was so thrilled I was able to have not just the birth that I wanted, but the birth of my dreams - in the water! I felt calm, confident and in control... most of the time! And most importantly, I was so blessed to have such a fantastic birth team. It wouldn't have been as wonderful as it turned out without each and every one of them. I could not have been any happier or more thankful than I was at that moment.
I am so in love with this little girl! I can't wait to bring her home to meet her new big sister!!!
Our little Emmy Sophia is here! She was born Tuesday, October 11th, 2011 at 11:21am. She was born completely naturally and without complications and weighed 6 pounds, 14 ounces and was 19 inches long. Below is the story of her arrival...
It's been a long two days - yes - two days in labor! I was always told that labor for the second child is always faster than the first, and my midwife and my doula were telling me this one will probably go faster - and Mila was born fast herself! (With Mila, contractions started at 1am, my water broke at 4am and she was born at 10:57am.) So we were all pretty nervous that things could go faster than we might anticipate.
Contractions Begin - Monday, October 10th, 2011
It all started early Monday morning. I woke up around 4am. I was feeling some contractions and at first, I ignored them and tried to fall back asleep. When I couldn't, I thought maybe we should start timing them, just to make sure. Jorge had installed an app on his iPad called Contraction Timer. I liked this app better than the one we used with Mila on the Blackberry the last time around. This one not only measures how far apart the contractions are, but also how intense they are. They were about 7 minutes apart but not that intense, so I thought I should shower, just in case this was the real deal. I remember being in the shower and it suddenly hitting me that this could actually be it and that my baby would be born today! As I got out of the shower, I felt really cold and I felt a rush of adrenaline. I started shaking so bad that my teeth were literally chattering and I started breathing really heavy. As I warmed up and got dressed, I continued to time my contractions. I realized that the intensity had gone down a bit and that they weren't happening as frequently. I've read that when you get excited/scared during labor and it causes an adrenaline rush, that it can actually turn off your labor. It's your body going into survival mode! Pretty clever, the body is. I was hoping this wasn't the case though. As nervous as I was to go into labor, I wanted it to happen already!
During my shower, Jorge called his sister, Blanca, to come over. She would be the one staying with Mila while we are at the hospital. Also, as luck would have it, we have our apartment listed for sale and we had a showing that afternoon to a potential buyer that has seen our place 3 times already and wanted to see it again during the day and once again at night to see the view from our balcony. So happy to have someone interested in our place, but not so happy that it just so happens to be the very same day I'm in labor!
We called my doula to give her an update on what was going on. Now, I've been a little anxious about my doula situation because I really, really wanted my doula from last time, Lorie. But her son's wife was going to be giving birth to her first grandson just around this time and there was a slight chance that she might be out of town when I went into labor. For that reason, I had picked a back up doula - and I felt sooo much better. Stacy was really just as fantastic as Lorie. I really wanted Lorie mostly because she'd been there with me last time and she knew what I liked, but I was comfortable with them both. Anyway, I called her to tell her what was going on and to see if she was in town. Luckily, she was - and she told me she'd be in town until the following evening, Tuesday night! YES!! I told her what I was feeling and she agreed that maybe the adrenaline had slowed down my labor a little bit, but based on how frequently they were coming and that they were still a bit intense, that I should call my midwife's office to let them know.
Ugh. I really didn't want to call the office. I knew who would be on call. The midwife practice I use has 3 midwives. I have my regular midwife, Terry, who delivered Mila and I love her. She's the one I usually go see. The other two are nice too, but I don't know them as well, and one of them I really don't feel like I have a connection with her. I mean, she's nice and all, I just don't feel a connection, ya know? The day I go into labor, it's the luck of the draw though - whichever one that's on call would be the one to deliver G2. And Terry was on call only 1 day this week! And of course, the midwife that happened to be on call yesterday was the one I didn't connect with! Figures!!
I procrastinated a bit and finally called. The contractions were a bit close together again though, about 7-8 minutes apart or so. She thought it might still be early labor, but since we live 45 minutes away from the midwife's office and from the hospital we want to deliver at, she thought it was best we should go to the office to get checked to see how I was progressing. I was so reluctant to go. I didn't want to drive all the way to the office 45 minutes away especially when I didn't feel like I was that far along and I soooo didn't want to get checked. It's absolutely awful! She said to be there at 10:30am. Ugh. I swear, I dragged my feet. I kept myself busy by doing my hair, my makeup, calling my parents and my sisters... I knew that I wasn't that far along. If I was still capable of talking and dilly dallying then I KNEW I wasn't that far along yet. (When I went into labor with Mila, by the time I left for the hospital, I couldn't hold a conversation, I didn't want to eat, I just wanted to be in the dark cuddled in the bed! I couldn't even comb my hair after getting out of the shower - forget blowdrying and straightening it! And when I got to the hospital that time, I was already 9cm!)
Don't be fooled, we had much more stuff in the car than what we're carrying!
Thankfully, Mila slept in a bit and by the time we left, around 9:45am, she was just waking up. We thought it was best to leave before she saw us, then she wouldn't have a chance to fuss (not that she normally does - but it's not every day that both mom and dad leave together so early in the morning without spending any time with her). We drove to the doctor's office. I knew there was a playdate with our mommy friends scheduled for that day, so on our way there, I called Heike to tell her what was going on. She was so excited for us! I was so happy to share this with her and the mommies - they've been there with me every step of the way!
At My Midwife's Office
We arrived at the office and the midwife saw me pretty quickly. I was so stressed about getting checked. It was more dreadful than I remember. It was still early and my cervix was high (read: that she has to go in further to feel for my cervix --- OUCH!!!!) and that I was 80% effaced (or thinned out), but only 2cm dilated. 2cm!!!!!! I was so pissed! I knew it was early!! She said that it's possible that the contractions continue and that I could go into labor later in the day, or they could stop and the baby wouldn't arrive until next week!! (When I told this part of the story to my mommy friend Spencer, she suggested that perhaps since this wasn't one of the midwives I preferred, that my cervix closed itself in protest! Oh my goodness - that made me laugh!! ) The midwife told me that although they tell first time moms to go to the hospital at 6 minutes apart, that for second time moms, it's not just the frequency of the contractions that matters, but the intensity. That for second time moms one could actually deliver at 6/7 minutes apart if they were strong enough. So she told me to make sure I kept track of the intensity as well, and she sent me home. Good to know!
Sent Home
We left the office at 11:30am and I called Lorie my doula, my parents, my sisters and the mommies with the update. So bummed. After being checked, the contractions slowed down to 8-9 minutes apart and the intensity decreased as well. We stopped and picked up Pollo Tropical for lunch, stopped at The Floridian to pick up some french toast I was craving (I was hungry? Definitely not that far along!) and then we went home and ate lunch with Blanca and Mila. The people that went to see our apartment had just left. After lunch, I laid down to rest. I was so tired and sleepy - I hadn't slept much that night! Jorge tried catching up on work, since he had taken the day off and wanted to get ahead in case the baby would be coming soon. Thankfully, Blanca was there to entertain Mila until her nap time. I was so tired! All this time, I'm still feeling contractions, they just are pretty manageable. Contractions are still 8-9 minutes apart, but not very intense.
Jorge trying to make me laugh.
After her nap, Mila played for a bit and then we went to Jack's hamburger place for dinner.Yep, there I was eating a burger and having contractions at Jacks! LOL!
My stylish outfit before going out! LOL! It had been raining and I needed sneakers and did not want to be bothered to change outfits.
Later That Night
That night, I went to bed and I was still feeling contractions. I texted Lorie with an update. Not much progress, that I thought it was pretty uneventful for now and nothing much to report. Then right before I went to bed I went to pee and I saw what I'm pretty sure was my mucous plug! (I know - TMI!) That's not too much of an indicator on it's own, but along with the other symptoms, I knew this might mean things were still going on. The contractions were about 8-9 minutes apart or so (which is still far apart) but they were getting a little more intense. I even wondered if they would let me sleep? Thankfully, I was able to sleep about an hour and a half before they got strong enough to wake me up....
Tuesday, October 11th, 2011
I woke up around 2:30am and Jorge had to talk me through a few contractions. They were surprisingly intense! It felt like really, really bad cramps. I called Lorie to update her. I had felt a little bit of pressure like I had to poop (which was alarming because that's similar to the feeling of pushing!), but later I realized it was just gas! LOL!
I told her I wasn't sure if this was really it and that I was nervous about getting to the hospital too early. I didn't want to be there any longer than I had to! She reminded me that if we did get there early, that I could always labor in the labor pool. That made me feel better. I didn't call my midwife's office right away though - I wanted to make sure this was really it.
We called Blanca so she could stay with Mila and she arrived quickly. It was about 5:00am by then. I waited an hour or so and once I saw the contractions were consistently intense, I called the midwife's office. Although the on call midwife still wasn't Terry (my usual midwife), the one that was was other midwife that I had connected with, Rachel. Although contractions were still about 7-8 minutes apart, she thought the intensity warranted that we should start heading out before rush hour. Since Jorge had packed up the car the morning before when we thought it was the real deal, there wasn't much left to put together, except for the small day-to-day stuff that we needed for the night (toothbrushes, slippers, chargers, etc.) and Jorge quickly got our stuff together.
Leaving for the Hospital
We finally left around 6:20am. The first elevator to get to our floor was the service elevator. On the way down, Jorge realized he forgot his cell phone, so I got off on the first floor and he went back up. I made my way slowly to the car and I had to stop and lean up against the wall during one of the contractions. I had just made it to the car when he came back down. Jorge had removed Mila's car seat from the backseat so I could lie down back there with my pillow. Contractions were getting so intense, I could no longer sit through them, I had to be lying down. I was still able to hold a bit of conversation between contractions, but when one came along, they were about an 8/9 intensity (out of 10) and I needed Jorge to talk me through them. They were intense!! I really wasn't in the mood to talk too much, so I sent out a text to my parents and my sister Cathy saying we were on our way to the hospital, but that I still thought there was plenty of time. No rush. (My mom and Cathy live an hour and a half from the hospital and I knew they had to work. I didn't want them to get there just to have to wait.) My dad called me to see how I was doing and we talked briefly, but then I felt a contraction coming and I cut him off with, "Contraction coming... I gotta go!" and I practically hung up on him! After that contraction was over, I texted my sister Cindy and Lorie to tell her we were on the way so they could meet us at the hospital.
At the Hospital
We got to the hospital pretty fast, at about 7am. It was still dark out. By this time, I'd gotten pretty comfortable in my position in the back seat of the car. I really didn't want to move, much less get up, walk, and go inside, so Jorge just parked. Lorie got there just a few minutes after we did and got into the car. I gave her an update on how I was feeling. I told her I didn't want to go into the hospital. I just wanted to stay in the car for a bit longer. I was afraid to go in if I wasn't that far along that they'd try to push drugs on me, that I couldn't eat/drink anything once I was admitted, that they'd hook me up to machines, etc... She was totally fine giving me time. She said we were in the middle of a shift change with the nurses anyway, so it would be fine to wait. She texted to find out who was working and requested we get a nurse that she knew was natural birth friendly. My sister Cindy arrived shortly afterward. In between contractions we talked about using the labor pool. I brought up again that I was nervous how that would work out... the hospital doesn't technically "allow" water births. They let you labor in the water, but they want you to get out before pushing. But at what point do they get you out? What if I don't want to get out? This really stressed me out. I know it's safe - I've researched it extensively - the hospital even already has guidelines written up on it, they just haven't signed off on it. So frustrating. Why couldn't I have the birth I wanted? I told Lorie wishfully, "It's my dream to have a water birth!" but in my mind I had already resigned myself to the fact that it wouldn't happen. She smiled, "Maybe for your next baby?"
I'd had a few more strong contractions in the car, and with that, Lorie then suggested we go inside. She pointed out that it seemed like the contractions were getting closer together and, again, she reminded me I would be more comfortable laboring in the water. I finally agreed.
Nurse Beth read the birth plan, which had already been signed by my midwife, and said everything looked good. Next, she had to check how dilated I was - which I HATE! Especially after being checked the day before and it being so painful! I braced myself and hoped there was progress... I was 5 cm. I was so surprised! I thought I was more! Beth was encouraging though. "It's the first five that take the longest... the next five are faster."
Next, Beth said she wanted to hear the baby's heartbeat and see if she was moving. She said she wanted to hook me up to the monitor, listen for the first 20 minutes and then she'd take off and just check intermittently. At this point, I'm still having contractions and they are pretty strong. I'm starting to lose the desire to have much conversation between contractions, I'm getting more serious and asked for the room to be darker... definitely progressing. Lorie, who had been helping me through contractions the whole time, asked me if I wanted her to set up the tub (which takes 30-40 minutes) or if I wanted her to stay with me for the contractions. I thought it was best for her to set up the tub.
While she set up, Jorge and Cindy helped me through the contractions. At first, I was using Jorge as my support for contractions, but he was doing so well with the counter pressure on my back, that I had him focus on that and used Cindy as my support. I put my arms around her shoulders during the contractions and tried to relax and breathe. It worked out perfectly. They both knew exactly what to do! I was so thankful to have them there with me!
Once the 20 minutes were over, Beth came back to check the printout of the fetal monitor. She said it seemed like the baby was still a little bit sleepy and wanted to hook me up to an IV to hydrate me and help wake her up a little. She said she'd do it through a hep-lock so I wouldn't be permanently attached to it. She would tape it up afterwards though, so I could get in the tub.
(Heparin Locks, or Hep Locks, are small tubes attached to a catheter, inserted into the arm and held in place with tape in order to administer drugs and fluids without injecting patients multiple times unnecessarily. Emergency situations require an accessible vein fast; the Hep Lock provides that accessibility. Medicine may be injected easily, making life simple for nursing staff and less painful for patients.)
Lorie was just about done with the tub, so I changed into my bathing suit top so I could get in the water. It was about 9am. Even though I had planned to get into the water the whole time, I was a bit reluctant. What if I didn't like being in the water? I didn't want to be wet and cold if I decided to get out. I thought I'd give it a try. Who knows, maybe I'd really like it? I got in and oh my goodness... I was so glad I did! It was so warm and relaxing. I asked they dim the lights. I wanted it to be dark. Someone closed the curtains, as the sun was already coming up. Lorie set up her iPod with relaxing music and I was in heaven... well, aside from the painful contractions, that is! It was so easy to change positions, move around and I didn't feel my weight. It took me a bit to find my spot in the tub though. I didn't know what position to get into. On land, my favorite laboring position was lying on my side, and after trying out a few spots, being on my side was the best in the water too. There was a little cushy stool at one end of the pool and I used that to rest my top knee, and I wrapped my arms around the side of the pool.
I kept my eyes closed and I did my best to focus on relaxing through the contractions. I honestly felt that dealing with the contractions in the water - although still painful - was a hundred times better than on the bed. Jorge talked me through them - he would tell me how long it had been since they'd started (15 seconds, 30 seconds, 45 seconds...). This helped a lot because most contractions last about a minute (although it feels like it's forever!) and the pain is like a wave, and they peak at about 30 seconds. So you know that once you pass the 30 second mark, that they won't get any more painful than that. He would remind me to relax my arms and my legs and my face and tell me what a good job I was doing. He would repeat this with every contraction, and although one might think it's repetitive - it isn't. I absolutely needed to hear it with every contraction. Hearing his voice helped me focus and relax. He was my rock!
The contractions were getting stronger and stronger. Lorie was also extremely helpful - she knew EXACTLY where to rub my back and use counter pressure to help with make them more tolerable. It was like she could read my mind - we were so in tune! I adore her!
Now that's a contracting belly!!!!
Typically, hospitals are very strict about not allowing a laboring woman eat anything once their admitted. The reason behind it is that should you require a c-section, the concern is that general anesthesia given to you for the surgery may cause you to vomit and aspirate it. However, recent studies have shown that general anesthesia is rarely ever given, even during c-sections, and even when it is, the changes in the practice have shown that aspiration rarely happens. (You can read more on it here.) Despite these studies, hospitals, even the one we were at, have been slow on changing their policy. In any case, Beth, the only hospital staff in our room, left the room a few times and I was able to have a few bites of a banana and a few sips of water without any concerns. (I don't understand how they expect women to have the energy to deliver a child on an empty stomach!)
Resting in between contractions...
... feeling the support of my birth coach (Jorge) and my wonderful doula during contractions.
Time passed, maybe another hour or so and the contractions were getting stronger and stronger and closer together. Beth, the nurse, would check the babies' heartbeat with a portable monitor on top of my belly.
I suddenly had the urge to pee. Lorie said I could go ahead and pee in the tub if I wanted. After all, pee is sterile. But - yuck! - I couldn't bring myself to doing it. To sit in my own pee? For who knows how long? I told her I wanted to use the bathroom instead. I waited until the next contraction was over and she helped me to the bathroom. It was literally 3 steps away from the tub and Lorie was right there with me - I had another contraction while sitting there! As soon as the contraction was over, I heard a tiny trickle... and I was almost sure it wasn't pee. Could it be my water, I wondered? I don't think Lorie noticed and I decided not to say anything. I was afraid that if anyone had any idea that my water was breaking or was broken, that I wouldn't let me back in the water - and I desperately wanted to get back in! At this time, I felt if I had stayed on the toilet for another contraction my water would really break. (Did you know the toilet is a very common and very helpful place to labor? The toilet would have definitely been my next best spot to labor in, had I not had the tub.) Sitting in the bathroom, I wasn't thinking so far ahead that I wanted to deliver in the water - I just wanted to be in it for the next contraction! It felt so good and it was so incredibly helpful! I couldn't imagine having to find another "spot" that I felt as comfortable in as I did then. Obviously, no one knows which contraction will bring on the urge to push, but I didn't care - I just wanted to be in the water when the next one hit. As soon as I got back in the water, I felt better. My mind started racing - it hit me that I wanted to have to have this baby here, in the water. I didn't want to get out again and I was afraid that they were going to ask me to get out at any moment. The contractions were really getting strong and I knew the end was soon.
Contraction in the bathroom.
During all of this, I have no idea that no one in the room has any clue how far along I am. When I have a contraction, it's not like what you see on TV. I'm not screaming, I'm not going into hysterics - I'm the complete opposite. The more you do those things - screaming, yelling, tensing up - the more the contractions hurt. In our Bradley Childbirth class, we were taught to close your eyes, relax and not fight the contractions so it would be easier to manage. So when Jorge, Lorie, Cindy and Beth saw me, all they saw was me lying quietly in the water - Jorge later said it looked almost like I was sleeping. (HA!) During contractions, I was doing my best to relax and focus on Jorge's voice...but inside, I was struggling - the water helped tremendously, but the pain was still incredible! I was using every ounce of energy I had to try not to fight it, not to tense up. I was so worried they knew how far along I was and they would ask me to get out at any minute... But I didn't realize it until afterwards, that although I knew it was getting close - from their perspective, they didn't.
It was getting harder and harder to stay relaxed during the contractions. Jorge was doing such a great job reassuring me, reminding m to relax my face and not to clench my jaw. He would tell me that it would be over soon, that the baby would soon be in my arms, that today would soon be yesterday, and what a good job I was doing... He was so encouraging and motivating. How I love my husband!! It also helped me to think of the baby using her name... it made it feel more real, and more connected to her.
I heard Rachel, my midwife that I'd spoken to on the phone earlier, come in. She gently asked me how I was feeling. I was doing fine. Beth checked the babies' heartbeat again. Baby was doing well too. Rachel encouraged me to take a few sips of water and I did.
More time passed and I realized I had to pee again. I wanted to go to the bathroom, but I wanted to wait until Rachel left. I was afraid my water would break and she wouldn't let me back in the tub. I would open my eyes every once in a while to check, and she was still there in the room. As if she could read my mind, Rachel suggested I go to the bathroom to try and labor there. I was convinced she had been telling me to drink because she was trying to get me out of the water! I kept telling her I would go later. I was waiting for her to leave the room! The contractions were so strong now, that I KNEW if I had one on the toilet, my water would most certainly break. I had to pee sooo bad! After a few very strong contractions, I felt slight pressure and the urge to push a little. Rachel again suggested I try laboring on the toilet. Again, I say, "Not yet." Ugh! If she only knew!
This entire time, I've had my eyes closed and I'm very focused inwards. I've been in my zone and not very aware what's going on with everyone - except for knowing Rachel was still in the room. I was so far in my labor trance, I didn't even notice when my mom arrived. I just opened my eyes briefly after a contraction, and there she was, smiling at me. I don't know how long she had been there. I was so surprised and relieved to see her. I was glad she would be there for the birth! I love my mom - even though I had told her earlier that morning not to rush over (I knew she had to work that morning and I didn't want her sitting around waiting for hours - who knew how long this would take?) she did anyway - and there she was.
Jorge and my mom
Lorie and Rachel talking.
The next time she suggested I go to the bathroom, I waited a few moments, and while still in my trance-like state with my eyes closed, I said, "Honestly, I'm afraid if I go to the bathroom, you're not going to let me back in the water..." I had my eyes closed, so I didn't know what her reaction was. I just waited for a response.
Silence.
Finally, Rachel responded matter-of-factly, "As of right now, I don't have any reason not to let you back in."
That's when it hit me - she doesn't know how far along I am! I'm already feeling the urge to push! I kinda had the feeling she was being flexible and accommodating with me, but I wasn't entirely sure. I had to pee so bad though - I took that as the response I wanted to hear. I said I'd go after the next contraction. Lorie again helped me to the bathroom. As soon as I was done peeing, another contraction hit. I put my arms around her shoulders, holding on to her. I struggled to relax and not fight it. A moment later, we both heard a small trickle and I knew it wasn't pee. Lorie asked, "Connie, is that your water?" I listened to the trickle. "No, I don't feel anything. I think it's the toilet making a noise," I said. I really thought it was the toilet. We listened again. Lorie said with a laugh, "No, Connie, that's your water!" I panicked a little. I whispered in her ear, "Lorie, it was trickling the last time I was in the bathroom... And the last contraction I had just now in the water - I was already feeling the urge to push!" She barely had a chance to respond with a, "Don't worry, you're doing fine," when another contraction came and it was really intense. Still sitting on the toilet, I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and tried to relax ... within a few seconds there was a super loud POP! and followed by a GUSH! Lorie exclaimed, "Your water just broke!" It sounded like it literally EXPLODED! It was so loud everyone heard it! Lorie said quickly, "Come on - let's get you back in the water!"
As I took those few steps back to the pool, another contraction came as I was putting my leg over into the pool. I tried to balance myself and my extra large belly carefully into the pool and quickly get back into my comfort position. But it was too late - this contraction was killer as I tried to get on my side - and I felt the urge to push again. I had a couple of minutes to think about pushing... what position was I going to get into? I was so comfortable on my side, but I didn't think that I could push that way. I attempted to change positions, but I didn't like it and went back to my side. Another contraction. This time, it was a real doozy. I then felt the urge to push and I pushed!! I felt that all familiar "ring of fire" feeling as the baby's head was crowning. (I remember feeling like it wasn't as bad as I remember it being with Mila. Probably because of the water?) It hurt so bad that for the first time during a contraction, I yelled. Even though my eyes were closed, I noticed the whole room startle. Everyone seemed surprised! I felt the baby's head come out. Lorie turned me from my side to my back and explained this would be a better position. She held me up under my arms as the next contraction came less than a minute later and I had a HUUUUGE urge to push. I remember thinking briefly that I probably shouldn't push too hard so that I wouldn't risk a tear, but I couldn't help it! I just wanted to get this over with! I wanted the baby out NOW!!! And another screaming push later - the baby was out! Rachel grabbed the baby and immediately pulled her out of the water. Lorie was saying excitedly, "Connie, open your eyes! You did it! Take the baby!" Rachel had her ready to hand to me and I put her on my chest. I was so overwhelmed - I was so happy it was over! I was out of breath and still gathering myself... I couldn't believe I did this... AGAIN!
Looking at each other for the first time!
Jorge was ecstatic. He was kissing me and helping me hold the baby. I was still recovering from that last contraction and was cringing a little because the baby was still attached to me through the umbilical cord and I could feel it was a bit taught and as it tugged, it was very uncomfortable.
I held the baby (who was still connected to me!) and with Lorie and Jorge's help, I walked to the bed with the baby in my arms. In our birth plan, we had requested that the umbilical cord not be clamped until it stopped pulsating. (Read more about delayed cord clamping here.)
During that time, I got to hold our little girl. She was just the sweetest thing. I looked at Jorge, "So we're good on her name, right?" He nodded. It's not like we had any other choices picked out! And her name would be Emmy Sophia. We'd had "Emmy" on the list for a while and had been going back and forth on it. The middle name was a bit harder to choose, but I'm really happy with our final decision. It was the perfect name for her.
After about 20 minutes the cord had stopped pulsating and a small push later and the placenta came out without any problems. But I was still having cramping - the afterbirth pain was strong! Almost as bad as the contractions. Lorie says it gets worse with every childbirth - yikes! This was pretty bad already! Plus, I had a small tear and I needed a few stitches. And here I thought I was done! :(
She was 6 lbs, 14 oz and 19 inches long!
Emmy didn't like being in the warmer, though. She was crying so bad. She needed to be there for a bit longer and it was a bit far from me, at the foot of the bed. I told Jorge to put his hands around her and pretend he was holding her. I just had a feeling that it would calm her down. He did it and instantly, she quieted down.
Finally, she was bundled up and Jorge got to hold his little girl for the first time.
Daddy with Emmy - I love this man!!
Finally! The worst part was over! I had been afraid of this birth because Mila's birth had been so perfect that I thought Emmy's would have more challenges. But I was wrong! It was perfect and special in it's own way. I was so thrilled I was able to have not just the birth that I wanted, but the birth of my dreams - in the water! I felt calm, confident and in control... most of the time! And most importantly, I was so blessed to have such a fantastic birth team. It wouldn't have been as wonderful as it turned out without each and every one of them. I could not have been any happier or more thankful than I was at that moment.
Jorge, Emmy and I with Cindy and Lorie
The best birth team in the whole, wide, world: Rachel, Jorge, Emmy, Cindy, Lorie and Nurse Beth
Shortly afterwards, we had to move out of the Labor and Delivery Room to the Recovery Room. Before we left, Cindy brought Panera for lunch and my mom got to hold Emmy while I ate.
Abuelita and Emmy
My dad and Cathy came by later on in the evening to meet our little girl. So excited to share our little bundle! :) Everyone was able to get a photo op!
Abuelito and Emmy
Tia Cici and Emmy
Tia Tatti and Emmy
I am so in love with this little girl! I can't wait to bring her home to meet her new big sister!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
LinkWithin
